"F*** me now, slave – or I'll spend more of your money on Versace china and wigs!" 

Last night's episode of Real Housewives of Atlanta was a lesson in living large, but not necessarily in charge. We spent our last day in Casa de Eviction where the Zolciak-Biermann fam was unceremoniously tossed out, left to the mercies of a generic moving company and schlepping 17,000 square feet of wigs back to Big Poppa's condo. Le sigh. My how the delusions of grandeur have fallen. 

Elsewhere Kenya Moore continued to rock crazy like it's a pair of Louboutins. I would say she wears it well, but she doesn't. Instead she comes off looking the girl in foolboutins. I think they sell them at Payless. BOGO bitches!

Things begin at Casa de Eviction, where Kim Zolciak, wig askew, is like freaking out. She's got a whole house to move and one day to do it and no one is helping her. So she storms around ranting and blaming the movers for everything. Sweetie is shockingly the voice of reason as she tries to steer Kim in the direction of focusing on the important things – packing her wigs and makeup. Apparently Sweetie wants to spare us a Kim sans her face. 

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Instead Kim stands in the kitchen screaming at Kroy to take her upstairs to "f**k his wife." Yep, in front of God, her children, and all the viewing public Kim remains as a beacon of class and elegance as she berates her husband for not doing it to her enough. That was peppered with a slew of eff-bombs and other curse words. Kroy Biermann couldn't be more disinterested as he continued to stuff pizza in his mouth and chug Dr. Pepper. I don't know how anyone could eat in the middle of all that, but um… maybe he was trying to numb the pain. Emotional eating? 

Lack of pregnancy porn action falls under the category of "wig people problems." 

Other wig people problems: Kim now declares that her former dream house is now a haunted mansion. Apparently poltergeists in the form of Kim's mounting bills, her salacious past, and her filthy mouth have returned to haunt her. Naturally none of this is her fault. It's landlord, Kendra's fault because Kendra took the liberty of calling Kim "I Wig For Free" Biermann out on her remiss duties as a tenant and client. 

So yeah, now Kim's house is haunted and this house has been nothing but bad lucks and bad omens. I find it hard to believe that THAT basement contains anything creepy other than a box of Kim and Kroy's used sex toys or something. That's truly gross. Do you think they have a blowup doll with a wig on it?

While complaining about Kendra, Kim is just eff this, eff that, effing biatch, effing house. Kim needs a cussing jar! She'd be able to buy a million dollar home in a week. Free and clear, baby! Just like… Kandi Burruss! 

Kandi is settling in to her new mansion and Mama Joyce is over to gossip about the Wigmann family and to drop hints that she too should be moving into Kandi's new place. Kandi is well-aware that mamas and hot relationships need remain separate, but poor Joyce seems a tad lonely. 

Kandi distracts her by spilling the details of Kim "Dang, your house is ghetto" Biermann being evicted from her mansion and squatting illegally while she resigned herself to the fact that it was back to the condo. Kandi also fills Joyce in on Kim's rude comments about her neighborhood being unsafe, but like Kandi points out – at least her neighbors OWN their homes and aren't pulling some shady section 8 nonsense. 

Phaedra Parks' son Ayden is turning two and to celebrate the momentous occasion Phaedra and Apollo are taking him to get his first haircut. Ayden is the. cutest. And he is having none of the haircut. 

Apparently Apollo is a "master barber" which is what he was doing when Phaedra met him, but now he just does it on the side. He does the honors of his son's first haircut. It still remains to be seen what Apollo actually does for a living, but he's got quite the interesting history. All in all it was a completely cute and adorable scene. 

Checking in with Porsha Stewart she's still got problems understanding the differences between Miss USA and Miss America. She's making breakfast and filling hubby Kordell Stewart in on the Kenya problem and Kordell too lacks the understanding of how the whole pageant scheme works. These two seriously need to start utilizing Wikipedia more often. 

Porsha is frying eggs and talking about how Kenya's are fried, toasted, and done gone. Porsha chalks all Kenya's weirdness up to her insecurity about being old and single. 

Porsha maintains she didn't even have to introduce ol' low-rent 100-year-old beauty queen, but she saw Kenya was pouting in the corner and tried to do her tarnished crown a solid. Porsha decides no matter what there is no way she'll ever be friends with the "older lady" who has "low self-esteem." Desperate cougars can be dangerous! 

And speaking of Kenya, she's introducing Walter to her family and she's nervous that he won't adhere to the script and tell them how fabulous she is while dropping down on one knee to propose. Instead Walter announces himself to be the "Martin Luther King of towing…" So that's a memorable first impression. Walter is just such a square. Ugh, he bores me. He's so insincere and awkward. Nothing about this relationship rings true. 

Kenya spends the whole dinner openly badgering him to talk marriage and babies, but instead Walter is sending Kenya's aunt subliminal secret messages with his eyes, pleading with them to set him free. Kenya has been holding him hostage until she ovulates and forcing him to drink moscato. Real men don't drink moscato. 

Walter yammers on about his past and why he believes relationships take time while Kenya is practically leaning on his plate interrupting and seething. I kept waiting for her to stab that man with her fork, screaming: 'If you don't impregnate me – NO ONE WILL EVER GET PREGNANT BY YOU!' Kenya's aunt seems ecstatic. She actually cheers about how much she likes Walter. Maybe she respects a man that can say no to crazy?

Something tells me marriage and Kenya will never be happening where Walter is concerned… Can't turn crazy into a housewife! Get out while you can, Walter – this one is Lifetime Movie territory. 

Phaedra is celebrating Ayden's birthday with a lavish party coordinated by Dwight. I think he needs to start investing in Michael Jackson style prosthetic noses because that thing has changed again. He must snore like a nightmare. Phaedra explains her style of entertaining means "coordinating experience." And with that she arrives at the party, hosted at the aquarium, with a marching band and riding on a choo-choo train. 

Phaedra feels she's toned it down since she only has TWO cakes this year instead of twelve. Can't you just invite the kids over for pizza? The party includes a whole host of activities including a dolphin show Phaedra describes as dolphins meets Broadway. I think they were performing Shakespeare, but I speak dolphin about as well as I understand The Bard, so I don't really know. What I do know is that both Kandi and Ayden were falling asleep. 

Poor Ayden is forced to spend the entire party with a $100 bill safetypinned to his shirt, apparently passing the Benjamins is a southern tradition I've never heard of. 

In the middle of dolphins doing renditions of Hamlet and riding a train driven by manatees, Kim calls to let Phaedra know a little thing called her eviction is preventing her from attending. Phaedra is less than impressed as she lets Kandi listen in on the excuses. Kandi thinks Kim should stop letting all her business go public, but I couldn't disagree more. I love hearing about all Kim's shenanigans. 

Back at Kim's house she's complaining that Kendra is putting their business on twitter and as payback Kim is pulling up the $40,000 worth of landscaping she installed at Kendra's when she thought they were buying it. Kim announces she's going to post all her Amex statements on twitter to prove she doesn't owe Kendra money. Wait a second… she's PAYING HER RENT ON A CREDIT CARD?!?!?!? Did I hear this correctly? 

Oh, Kim…  Kroy Biermann, paging Kroy Biermann –  your balls are waiting for you at the customer service desk. Repeat: Please come and collect your balls, Kroy Biermann! 

And in a little scene I think could be conducted entirely without sound, ala silent movies, NeNe Leakes finally makes an appearance to give Cynthia Bailey a little present. Apparently Phaedra's donkey booty fouled her and it accidentally "butt dialed" one of NeNe's friends and left a voice mail. NeNe is practically levitating with the anticipation of drama, freak-outs, and zillions of fights caused by one lone voice mail. 

Cynthia couldn't make it to Ayden's party since she was out of town and she let Phaedra know. While Phaedra was all nice and sweet, in the voice message she is caught admitting she doesn't give a "fuck" if Cynthia comes to the party or not. Oops! 

The best part of this scene were Cynthia and NeNe's facial expressions. It was like a mime re-enacting Real Housewives, minus the wine sloshing, it was priceless. NeNe snarks that Phaedra's prayer cloth is merely to cover up her evil ways – and a prayer cloth and preacher can't save her now! 

Nobody puts Cynthia in the corner. Before this can turn into another war of insignificance vs. insecure (a Housewives classic), Cynthia ladies up and decides she's going to handle this like a grown woman and confront Phaedra in person about the voicemail. Color me impressed! What a letdown for Ms. Leakes! 

So Cynthia invites Phaedra to lunch where she comes with a present for Ayden. Cynthia is classy. I underestimated her. Not mincing words Cynthia asks Phaedra if she ever said such a thing. Phaedra denies it, claiming she doesn't talk that way and has no recollection of ever making such a comment. Then Cynthia calmly reveals that she actually HEARD the voicemail and yeah, that's what was said. Phaedra continues to deny, deny, deny and then starts changing the subject and giggling weirdly.

Phaedra, dang, don't like like a wig on somebody's head. Just admit it and say you know what I may have said that, I don't remember and I'm sorry. That was rude and uncalled for. End of story. 

Speaking of wigs, Kim is back in Big Poppa's house and she needs courage in the form of donuts to get her through the shame of shirking back to the old hovel. Kim claims she had THREE offers on the condo but decided not to sell. Apparently it was fate that she was supposed to return to the place where Kroy was a mere non-factor and Big Poppa was the man whose ring she wore. 

Nothings changed, and Kim's wigs line up like sentries along the sideboard as a maligned Kim mournfully bites into a Boston Creme Donut and sighs a dreadful sigh. Well, wigs, she says addressing her ladies. 'We're back. I thought we were meant for better things, bigger ones, but maybe we'll always have mansion dreams on a condo budget. Donut?'

And then the truck full of dead palm trees and murdered plants arrives to be dumped on the front sidewalk of the townhouse. 

That's not the only mess imploding. Over at Kenya's she's invited Walter over for dinner and since she didn't have time to cook she's making some TV dinners and dumping them on a plate. She throws a pot on the stove of the otherwise immaculate kitchen so it looks like she prepared the meal. If Walter falls for that he's dumber than Kroy.

Kenya ushers Walter outside to the back yard where a hoard of bugs is screaming and shrieking 'NO WALTER! Save yourself. Leave, now! She's crazy. She trapped us here!' Needless to say it was distracting, which was possibly a good thing because it was more of Kenya begging Walter to knock her up and get her down the aisle. 

Kenya tells Walter that this home-cooked meal she slaved over is proof that she's ready to settle down. Dang Kenya – lying to a man about cooking and then trying to beg him for a ring over glumpy microwaved pasta with an opera of bugs in the background is why you're single in your 40s! Get it together – and get some citronella.  

Walter gulps, and says he needs more moscato to get through this, while a drunk and Lifetime wincing Kenya sloshes her drink around in her glass and smiles tightly at him. I'm pretty sure Kenya drugged dinner and is going to steal some of Walter's sperm and get out the turkey baster!

Next week, things get heated with Madame Zolciak and hopefully Cynthia and Phaedra can make amends! 

[Photo Credit: BravoTV.com]

TELL US – PHAEDRA'S BOOTY DIAL: TOTALLY RUDE OR NOT THAT BIG OF A DEAL? WILL KENYA AND WALTER EVER GET MARRIED? 

I'm going to be totally honest with y'all…every time I'm assigned a Real Housewives of Atlanta post which involves NeNe Leakes and Kim Zolciak I hear NeNe's voice in my head screaming variations of "Keep your legs closed to married men" and "WIG!" the entire time I'm typing.  It's equal parts awesome and a tad crazy.  It's like I have NeNe Tourettes. 

We all know that the once besties turned frenemies turned mortal nemeses (Looky there!  I just learned the plural of nemesis…informative and educational!) have been going back and forth about the real reason Kim allegedly leaves the show mid-season.  There's even a Twitter battle immortalized on the Internet where they spewed insults.  Kim claims she quit, while NeNe has her on blast for being fired. 

Kim counters with her own spin-off in the works (why would Bravo fire her, it basically promoted her?), while the Neenster cites pre-existing contractual obligations regarding said spin-off.  Is NeNe going to law school in between filming her reality show, her sitcom The New Normal, and her guest spots on Glee? Kim's new spin-off is set to premiere in April and is creatively titled Don't Be Tardy… does she owe Kandi Burruss royalties for that title?

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A source confirms to Us Weekly that Kim will be bidding farewell halfway through this season.  The insider tells the magazine, "Kim has a total blowout with production."  Yeah, okay.  We got that from the season's previews.  However, it's what the fight was about that I find the most ridiculous.  Apparently over brunch, Cynthia Bailey invites the crew on the requisite season trip (this time to Anguilla) to watch her renew her vows to husband Peter Thomas.  Kim, who is clearly too pregnant for airline travel then has it out with the crew.  Why doesn't she just politely decline?  I mean, we all know she's not required to travel with them…she missed out on Africa last season. 

The insider continues, "Kim was furious!"  Cynthia adds her two cents with a little more diplomacy, explaining, "We don't see much of Kim this season.  She's doing her own thing."

Kim, of course, wants to focus on her reported new spin-off and doesn't have time for NeNe's drama.  She reveals, "I want positivity around me."  Preferably positivity that wasn't purchased by Big Poppa. 

Fortunately for Kim (WIG!), but unfortunately for NeNe, if Kim wants payback for all of the Neenster's call-outs on Twitter, she need not look any further than what happened to NeNe over the weekend.  The reality star, sitcom star, teen musical star (take your pick) has been celebrating her wealth around Atlanta in a new Bentley.  Welp, not anymore.  Diary of a Hollywood Street King is reporting that NeNe got an unexpected and unwanted surprise while dining at a local Georgia hot spot.  During her meal, NeNe's new Bentley was repossessed.  What's worse?  It was draped in a "Repossessed by Bentley" cover before being carted away.  Mortifying!  I hope NeNe had money for a cab!

A source close to NeNe tells the site, “NeNe is fronting, she’s living way beyond her means. NeNe spends $17K a month, and her home is about to go into foreclosure. She lost her Bentley and she’s about to lose her home too.”  Someone get this woman a financial planner, stat!

NeNe denies she had any such She By SheBroke-esque nonsense happen to her. Taking to twitter she set the record straight: 

Adding, "Still n the same house,still drive the same car, Still work on 3 shows!…..it's hard 4 people 2 b happy 4 ur SUCCESS" NeNe, of course, blames blonde wig-wearing, recently evicted haters for telling lies about her in the media. 

TELL US-DO YOU THINK KIM QUIT OR WAS FIRED?  IS NENE LIVING BEYOND HER MEANS?

[Photo Credits: Credit: D. Salters/WENN.com & WENN.com]

Bravo REALLY loves hanging out in Atlanta!

The network announced today that it will roll out two new reality shows based in the city – alongside it's current hit Real Housewives of Atlanta and the upcoming second season of Kim Zolciak's spinoff, Don't Be Tardy.

The first show, tentatively titled Taking Atlanta, will feature a "group of aspiring and ambitious Atlanta locals as they make their mark in the arenas of fashion, music, hospitality and real estate while exploring the city’s sizzling social scene and balancing the demands of their tumultuous family situations."

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Sounds a little like the current cast of RHOA, no? Ooh, they said aspiring fashion stars!  Perhaps She by Sheree will be back!  #wishfulthinking

The second new series in the works, Married to Medicine, is described as "following a group of successful and educated women, including doctors and wives of doctors, who are connected to the world of medicine in Atlanta and do everything with style, drama, and of course, Southern flair."

In the announcement, Bravo shared a little peek at what Kim's season 2 will feature for storylines.  One possibility is adoption!  Let the rumors begin!  Bravo says the show "follows Real Housewives Of Atlanta standout Zolciak and Kroy Biermann in the next phase of their marriage, which involves the demands of their ever-growing family, purchasing their dream house, and a possible adoption."

TELL US – ARE YOU EXCITED ABOUT MORE ATLANTA IN THE MIX?  ARE YOU TUNING IN NEXT SPRING FOR KIM'S SPINOFF?

Photo Credit: Andres Otero/ WENN.com

Real Housewives of Atlanta's Kim Zolciak should have some extra cash lying around, don't you think?  After all, she and Kroy Biermann downsized to Big Poppa's already paid for condo, and you know they are selling baby pictures left and right.  So why hasn't she paid for her million dollar wedding?  I guess that's what happened when you live way, way, WAY above your means!

While Wig is pretending that everything is hunky dory, there are some people, celebrity party planner Colin Cowie for one, who are waiting to get compensated for their services.  It's a good thing Kim has another Bravo spin-off in the works! 

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According to Radar Online, Bravo was not footing the bill for Kim's insanely over-the-top wedding much to Kim's chagrin.  I still remember that lace catsuit.  {shudders} A family member (Kim's mom perhaps?) tells the site, "Kim said that she was having to pay her wedding planner over $1,000,000 for her big ceremony and Bravo wasn't picking up the tab."

Kim, of course, denies owing anyone any money.  No surprised there!  Colin Cowie's company refuses to say whether it is owed any outstanding bills, stating, "We do not comment on our business relationships with our clients."

However, a valet company which was contracted out by Cowie's company confirms that no one has been paid.  A representative for the company shares, "Colin Cowie Lifestyle (CCL/CCE) contracted with AAA Parking to provide valet parking services on November 11, 2011 at Ms. Zolciak’s residence in Roswell, Georgia. The event and valet parking services were extended by an additional hour at the request of Colin Cowie representatives resulting in an additional charge."

The valet rep continues, "The total invoice of $2,550 remains unpaid. CCL/CCE has advised us that they have not been paid for any services they provided for the Zolciak wedding."  Yikes!  Colin Cowie doesn't have to comment if AAA Parking has all the details!

Thankfully, Tamara Tattles has the low down on Kim's upcoming spin-off Don't Be Tardy…(for the what?  The bill collector?) which will hopefully put some cash in her bank account.  The show will center around Kim and Kroy and their growing family as they build their dream house and consider adoption (oh great).  Tamara claims that the show will mainly focus on building Kim's castle, and that Brielle and Ariana were pulled out of school to film.  She also confirms that the girls are going by the last name Biermann in school, although it is uncertain as to whether Kroy formally adopted them.  Hopefully that is the adoption to which Bravo is referring!

For her part, Kim recently blogged about how fortunate she is to have the spin-off while getting in a quick dig to former friend NeNe Leakes.  She explains, "You know, who doesn't want their own show? I'm so blessed to have that. It's incredible and I'm grateful for that. So while NeNe has roles, I have shows."

Now NeNe is hinting that those roles could land her another genre.  She tweeted last night:

Oh, NeNe, haven't you heard of a little something called overexposure?

TELL US-DO YOU THINK KIM HAS PAID THE BILLS FOR HER WEDDING?  WOULD YOU WATCH A TALK SHOW HOSTED BY NENE?

[Photo Credits: Credit: D. Salters/WENN.com & WENN.com]

Kim Zolciak's very public war with her parents continues, but Kim is now trying to put duct tape over her parents' mouths so they can't blab to the tabloids about the truth her. 

The Real Housewives of Atlanta star is seeking a gag order against Karen and Joe Zolciak after they spoke out about Kim's behavior to the media. Kim and her parents are fighting over visitation of her daughters Brielle and Ariana. 

TMZ reports that last week Kim filed an "emergency motion" asking a judge to squash her parents from discussing the on-going court case. 

Kim's motion states that her parents saying negative things about her to the media are harmful to the girls and it is a smear tactic to make her look bad. 

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Kim also claims her parents are trying to make this family drama public for "their own selfish reasons" and financial gain. Kim (through her rep) claimed that Karen has a tell-all book in the work with a $50,000 deal! 

A judge has yet to issue a ruling on the matter. 

In a previous hearing sixty day mediation time was set by a judge previously hoping both parties could come to mutual agreement. 

Moving on Kim also has drama with her wedding planner Colin Cowie. Kim hired Colin to plan her million dollar wedding featured on Don't Be Tardy For The Wedding, and rumor has it she never ponied up for her bill. Maybe she was waiting for Big Poppa to pay?

Colin quickly got on twitter to deny that Kim owes him anywhere near the million or $200,000k reported. "@Kimzolciak @colincowie — all stories and gossip — it's not a million, it's not $200k, it's 20k. Let's settle this with the truth!"

And finally, new Housewife Kenya Moore has an agenda besides being crazy! The newbie recently announced on Twitter that she's working on her own hair line. Ugh – this again? Always, the products! Stoppit Bravo. 

Kenya tweeted: "I'm working on my own hair care line only use my own products. Weaves and wigs are ok but if you want healthy or long hair my products work." 

Is the jury still out on whether or not Kenya's hair is real?

And finally – TONIGHT is THE NIGHT! Kim Z flees RHOA in a fit or rage and smacks a camera man. Yes, the be-wigged one is fleeing the coop! Dang, snarking on her is so much fun. 

Reality Tea will be live-tweeting the wigging out and we wouldn't miss it for the world! I know you'll be joining us. 

Real Housewives of Atlanta airs tonight on Bravo at 9/8c. 

[Photo Credit: BravoTV.com]

TELL US – DO YOU THINK KIM NEEDS A GAG ORDER? HOW MUCH DOES SHE OWE COLIN COWIE? SURPRISED KENYA IS ALREADY COMING OUT WITH HER OWN PRODUCT LINE?

So last night Real Housewives of Atlanta was filled with Wig People Problems. Oh, wigs were disappearing and telling tall tales and making excuses and dealing with dog poop and storming out and doing some math wrong and disappearing. There were wignanigans all over the place.

And luckily NeNe Leakes was on hand to provide riotous commentary on every last wigantic. And she finally got to use her Wig Be Gone (sold separately, includes S&H) – and poof! Kim Zolciak, her wig collection, and her stories that change as often as said wigs fled in the wake of a Housewives revolt. And we bid her adieu. Will we miss her? Sure. I mean, she is a snark lovers dream!

Other things happened last night, Kenya Moore's crazy got even MORE crazy as she turned her attentions towards another lady's man. Cynthia Bailey tried to pretend that going on vacation with all the ladies of the RHOA was her dream come true. Yeah, but instead of speaker phone invites (the classic!) we got sit down personalized invites. 

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Let's get started! Things begin with Phaedra Parks and Apollo Nida having the double-date from hell. They're forced to go to some sort of family fun park with Ticking Klock Kenya and the self-described MLK of towing, Walter. Walter is a terrible actor. 

You know Phaedra was renegotiating the terms of her contract after evening! Everybody knows Phaedra Parks, ESQ does not deal with disturbed, desperate, and in possession of a fake donkey booty!

Kenya is all dressed up and Phaedra is in jeans. And almost immediately Kenya is all over Apollo. Like visibly salivating, molesting him with her eyes, and probably planning to solicit him for a sperm donation. If I were Apollo I would be afraid she'd trap me alone somewhere with the infamous turkey baster – mama will get herself a baby Lifetime movie style!

Apollo was flattered by Kenya's overt flirting, Phaedra was not impressed. Walter didn't even seem to notice he was so checked out. He was probably secretly texting Apollo to please take her… 

It was a little frightening – I was cringing for Kenya. Dang – she needs to keep it in her pants! They discuss her participation in the Parks-Nida Donkey Booty empire and Kenya is all too happy to be working veryclosely with Apollo since he's so "Fi-one!" I think Phaedra has already started the process for a restraining order… 

Next they hop on some go-carts. Kenya is so excited you'd think someone just told her Apollo knocked her up. She's shrieking, jumping around, making all sorts of crazy faces. I mean, I guess she's a girl who likes go-carts. Or she doesn't get out much. Poor Walter gets left in the dust with the slow car, which is only fitting since he's a non-factor in every way possible except for the hilarious storyline of Kenya faux stalking him for a ring/baby. 

Phaedra could care less about winning the go-cart race. Meanwhile Kenya is living out her own personal Mario Kart dreams as she speeds around the track, hair blowing in the wind. Apollo passes her as if they are the only two on the road. She imagines them meeting at the finish line and then bailing on those other two turtles as they race off into the sunset, she with her Miss USA crown and he in a Speedo. And then she runs out of gas. Literally. She is stuck dead on the track as even Walter passes her. 

Over at Cynthia's house she's having NeNe and the newly reinstated Gregg over for drinks and vacation talk. Peter, who's been largely invisible so far this season thankfully, is busting open some super expensive rare bottle of wine. Sadly it takes like poop and they dump it out. Then they crack open the $8.99 moscato. Can't go wrong with two-buck chuck in my world!

NeNe and Gregg arrive and Cynthia pitches the idea of a couples trip to Anguilla because Peter knows the director of tourism or something and they can get a good deal. Is this like Phaedra knew the Vice President of South Africa last year? NeNe is all, Okkkaaaaaaa until Cynthia drops that she wants to invite all the girls – even the Wig-Biermanns. And then NeNe is like raincheck! 

Peter has to reel her back in so as Cynthia pretends to go look for something, Peter shares that he's planning a secret vow renewal in Anguilla to make up for their botched wedding and so NeNe and Gregg have to come on the trip. NeNe decides since Cynthia hates surprises, this will be good, and so it may be worth it. 

Moving on, Porsha Stewart and her husband Kordell are headed to the gyno's office where she's getting an ultrasound. Porsha reveals that she had a uterine fibroid that caused a miscarriage about six months ago and she's been working to shrink the fibroid so she can try to get pregnant again. 

Porsha starts waxing idiotically about her family plans. Apparently Porsha wants 4 children, but she doesn't want to be pregnant 5 times, so she wants two sets of twins so she'll only be pregnant 8 times and then she'll be done. She already has a step-daughter, so that means she only needs 4 more children and her family will be complete. Because 3+1 = 5. 

Also, Porsha is going to be eating a lot of yams. Because yams increase your chance of having twins in some remote village in Africa. 

Oh good lord with these two. I don't know if Porsha and Kordell don't have two brain cells between them to rub together or this ditzy and dimwitted thing is an act for the cameras. I mean, she seems nice enough but there is a calculator on the iPhone if you're confused about what 2+2 equals. 

Maybe Porsha can go the Kate Gosselin route and just do one pregnancy with like 6 kids. Cause she only wants 4, right? On a serious note, I hope she can get pregnant and carry to term successfully. 

Back to ridiculous, Cynthia is going out to lunch with Kandi Burruss. Apparently Cynthia is the ambassador between Team No for NeNe and Team I Am NeNe. She spills her intentions about the girls trip to Anguilla since they've all promised to take a vacation as a group from now until the end of time. 

Kandi is interested in the idea, but then Cynthia says she wants it to be a couples trip and Kandi is like my boyfriend used to work with y'all and he knows you're crazy broads, so I don't think he wants to go on vacation when it will all be producer-drama and fighting. Cynthia says she wants to invite Kim, but hasn't talked to her, so Kandi says she'll give her a call. 

Then they discuss the absurdities of NeNe + Kim vacay. Kandi says the problem with NeNe is that she always has a motive and she's only about people when she can get things from them. Very diplomatically Cynthia explains that perhaps they just don't connect, and that's fine, but NeNe has no issue with Kandi or Phaedra. Kandi does not agree. Cynthia wants to have a lunch with all the ladies to discuss all the details. 

I know people think she's boring, but I love Cynthia. She's just classy and normal. It's refreshing in a world where everyone is faking it for ratings and recognition.

Now it's time for Cynthia and NeNe to be introduced to new Housewife, Porsha. They head over to the Hosea Williams Foundation where NeNe reveals that she actually took acting classes from Porsha's uncle. 

Porsha sits them down, awkwardly in the middle of the room on what looks like banquet chairs and starts rambling about how important it is to feed the hungry all year. Like all 265 days of the year. Like cause that's alotta days that people need food. I guess the other hundred days it's OK for people to go hungry?

Then she solicits them to participate in a PSA announcement and since they are required by Bravo to do it, NeNe reluctantly agrees and Cynthia is on-board. So after that boring helping people stuff is done, Porsha cracks open the champagne at the ripe old hour of noon and they get to bitching and boozing about ol' Kenya!

Porsha retells her experience with the charity event Kenya where bailed and Cynthia reveals that she also had an unsavory experience. It's determined that Kenya is just icky and they don't like her. Cynthia feels relieved that someone else besides her thinks Kenya is a few silicone injections short of a full booty. 

Kandi and Phaedra go shopping to discuss the trip to Anguilla and the necessary accessory that is Kegel Balls. Kandi wears hers while she talks, while she cleans, while she cooks, while she purchases hideous frames adorned with giant bows. Phaedra is excited about the possibility of Kegel Balls, but she would much prefer a penis ring as she's not sure she's up to the task of multi-tasking like Kandi is. Balls have their time and place apparently, and that place is in Anguilla, in the bedroom with a penis ring. 

Phaedra reveals that the Anguilla trip was planned after they confirmed dates Kim could go and the entire trip was planned around their schedule. Foreshadowing… 

Behind Cynthia's back Kandi also plans to invite Kenya because she thinks she's cool and the life of the party. And because the producers made her. Life of the party is a nice way of saying crazier than LSD. 

Never a dull moment in the land of wigs and cigs, eh? Kim Zolciak has had one helluva a shitty year. I mean, sure she got a hubby, a spinoff, and a baby out of it, but otherwise it's been bad news blues. An eviction, a possible firing, a public and nasty feud with her parents, and now she apparently owes the IRS big time. Time to pawn some wigs and Versace china, girl. 

A source NeNe tells Celeb Dirty Laundry that the former Real Housewives of Atlanta star is in hot water with the IRS because she hasn't paid taxes in 10 years and owes them $7 million dollars! Um… what? I didn't know being a mistress was considered taxable income. 1099?

The news comes from a "close family member" who shares Kim has been committing tax fraud for years by not paying taxes on "hundreds of thousands of dollars worth of gifts" Big Poppa gave her. Apparently while they were fauxgaged, he was also shelling out a reported $250,000 for her spending allowance. He also unsuccessfully tried to limit her spending to $150,000 per month. 

CLICK CONTINUE READING FOR THE REST! 

Gifts over $50,000 are taxable and must be reported to the IRS, but Kim allegedly wasn't! Unfortunately she was flaunting all her lavish spending and belongings on RHOA and Don't Be Tardy For The Wedding, which means the government can use footage as leverage! Kim may or may not be investigated for tax fraud – and if convicted could serve jail time! Do they allow wigs in prison? What about wine? 

If Kim thinks living in 5,000 square-feet is cramped, she's gonna be in big trouble with a jail cell! 

Speaking of Kim and prison, her ex-husband who is currently incarcerated on child molestation charges is due to be released in February of next year. 

RadarOnline reports that Daniel Dominic Toce who is Brielle's father is serving time for molesting a 15-year-old girl. He's been in the slammer serving a 2 ½ years sentence for a single count felony sex abuse against a minor. Daniel was being housed in the  MacDougall-Walker Correctional Institution in Connecticut, a maximum security prison and was "recently transferred to the Brooklyn Correctional Institution in Connecticut, a level 3 medium security facility, in preparation for his release." 

Kim has been consulting lawyers since the time of his incarceration to get his parental rights terminated and may have been successful. Some media outlets are reporting Kroy Biermann legally adopted Kim's daughters, while others report there is no record indicating the adoption was finalized. 

Moving on, NeNe Leakes is not happy with the way editing played out on last Sunday's episode of RHOA. You know the wig-expulsion summit episode. 

Taking to twitter, NeNe continues to insist Kim's version of events (i.e. quitting) aren't true. 

NeNe also says a significant portion of her conversation with Kim was cut from the final segment, leaving viewers confused by what exactly Kim "lied on" NeNe about. NeNe seems to be alluding to the fact that producers edited the scene in Kim's favor to make it look speculative over whether she quit or was fired.

NeNe insists the reason Kim's spinoff will return for a second season is because contracts had been signed and production was already working on a plot for the show. 

“So clearly they edited out what kim lied abt cuz that ain't make not a bit of sense,” a follower tweeted. NeNe responded with, “Right.” 

"I was so confused! The way they edited it totally gave it away that something was missing," another follower said. "<And u are right," NeNe confirmed.

NeNe says Kim was let-go because "she was 2 difficult." 

 In her Bravo blog she discusses Kandi Burruss' comments about her and says Kandi really doesn't know her well enough to comment! 

"Kandi speaks negatively about me once again: lies can sometimes be damaging! Kandi has no idea who my friends are other than Cynthia [Bailey], what business relationships I have, and to be honest, she doesn't even know me that well," NeNe says.

"It's simply human nature for two people to meet one another and not really click, but let's not speak about things we truly have no knowledge of! Kandi can't name one person I've ever befriended for a reason, because there are none. I'm the type of lady that doesn't look for friendship. If one develops, then I welcome it."

"Kandi loves to say she's been in the business for 19 years and has accomplished so much. I wonder why I didn't befriend her. Kim befriended her for a song! Maybe I should have befriended her so I could walk around all day with balls stuck in my vagina!" 

And finally, the ratings are in for last week's episode and Kim's wig-out brought in 3.1 million viewers! Not bad, girls! 

[Photo Credit: D Salters/WENN.com & WENN.com]

TELL US – DOES KIM OWE THE IRS $7 MILLION? WOULD YOU SLEEP WITH BIG POPPA FOR $250,000 A MONTH? THOUGHTS ON NENE'S TWEETS ABOUT THE EDITING AND KIM LEAVING THE SHOW? DOES KANDI HAVE A VENDETTA AGAINST NENE?

Ding Dong the wig is gone! Real Housewives of Atlanta lost one of its original ladies in last week's episode when an enraged Kim Zolciak stormed out of a pre-cast trip planning brunch. Kim, who assured her co-stars she could travel during certain dates, then changed her mind citing her ever-shifting pregnancy due date. 

In her last Bravo Blog for the show that made her wigs a household name, Kim speaks out about why she felt she had to quit – and denies she was ever on board for the Anguilla trip!  

"Going to Anguilla would have been the trip of a lifetime, but under DOCTOR’S ORDERS I was unable to travel," Kim begins. "I had baby Kash August 15th, which was 5 weeks after that brunch!" 

"Traveling 32 weeks pregnant is such a scary risk and for the women to think that I was willing to take that risk FOR THEM is absurd, especially since I don't consider them my friends."

CLICK CONTINUE READING FOR THE REST! 

"Phaedra [Parks] stating, "I don’t have time for my friends?" Well, I don't and these women are NOT my friends," Kim insists. "The only person I considered my true friend was Kandi [Burruss] throughout the years." Uhhh… not NeNe Leakes?

Furthermore, Kim adamantly denies offering up dates she was able to travel. Many of the women rearranged their schedules to accommodate the so-called Kim approved dates. 

"When the ladies said I gave them dates that I was able to travel, I had no clue where they got those dates from. It honestly looked like a set up. It was a no-brainer that an 8 month pregnant woman can NOT leave the country." As for Kim's family trip to Lake Oconee, she explains it is one-hour away from Atlanta. 

And after all of the brunch dramatics, including NeNe calling her a liar, Kim had enough. So she decided it was her wig or no wig and bailed. 

"I was sitting there listening to them attack me, and I feel like I had an 'aha moment' — I have an amazing life with a great husband and awesome kids, why am I sitting here being attacked when I could be home being loved by my family. So I got up and left," Kim says.

"When I got to the car and my husband saw me so upset, he knew at that moment I had enough! It was no longer worth it to me and my unborn son to be in a constant state of turmoil." 

As for Kim's parting sentiments, she's glad the show came into her life, but feels it was her time to leave. "Bravo and RHOA have been beyond good to me, and I will be forever grateful for some of the moments that occurred on the show, but I couldn't deal anymore," Kim shares.

"I handled my sh– for five seasons, from fights, to arguments  to the tears, but being pregnant puts a whole new spin on everything, and what happens on the outside affects what happens with the baby on the inside, and that was my priority!"

However, Kim maintains she only quit for THIS season, as next season may or may not be a whole different ballgame! 

"I called it quits for this season, and I don't regret it at all," she concludes. "So no, I clearly wasn't fired, you can hear me say 'I'm done.'"

Well tonight is really and truly Kim's final moments on RHOA this season. She and hubby Kroy get into a scuffle with a camera man outside the restaurant before she departs for good. Meanwhile the other girls head to Anguilla where Kenya Moore apparently really, really lets loose – and unfortunately it's with another Housewives' husband! Oops. 

In addition, Anguilla promises one Housewife's donkey booty in a thong-th-th-th-thooooong! Oh lord. Get your cocktails ready, because I think you'll need them!

Real Housewives of Atlanta airs tonight on Bravo at 9/8c. As always, Reality Tea will be live-tweeting the episode! 

[Photo Credit: Credit: Andres Otero/ WENN.com]

TELL US – WILL KIM RETURN TO RHOA? DO YOU BELIEVE SHE NEVER GAVE THE LADIES SAFE TRAVEL DATES OR IS IT ANOTHER WIG TALE?

Last night the ladies of Real Housewives of Atlanta lost one Wig Zolciak and gained one Porsha Stewart – officially – and then they said good riddance to bad rubbish and headed to paradise. Sadly it was a bit of paradise lost when Kenya Moore lost it and got frisky, handsy, desperate and crazy. I don't ever want to hear her telling anyone how they should behave again after she fondled two women's husbands and solicited a concierge for a sperm donation. On twitter she blamed her antics on the "ah ah ah ah alcohol" Girl – there are no words. 

Things pick off where they left off last week with Kim storming out of the restaurant during the pre-Anguilla planning brunch. Kim stomps outside and immediately smacks a camera man, telling him, "get the f–k out of my face!" The camera crew laughs and is like, 'Please bitch, it's called a contract and you signed one!'

This is cue for Kroy Biermann (remember when we all thought he was so nice and sweet and too good for Kim?) to leap from the waiting Escalade – still driving the car Big Poppa bought, I see – and start screaming and threatening the camera crew. Oh Gomer Pyle you're so tuff. You lose your dignity over lady wig and you yell that f-word loud and proud so your mama in Montana can hear. Right. So anyone else so tired of the wigs and cigs hour?

After that the camera man reminds Kroy that Bravo will slap his butt with a lawsuit and that's not the sort of being f–ked he wants to deal with so better get in the car and drive away. 

And with that Wig and Gomer drove off to the townhouse Big Poppa bought and Kim screamed "I'm done!" 

CLICK CONTINUE READING FOR THE REST! 

Back inside everyone all but burst out laughing and it was sort of sweet that Kim's departure brought them all closer together. Trauma and ridiculousness often do that to a group. Suddenly they have something to bond over. Kandi Burruss and Cynthia Bailey continue to remain shocked that Kim denied offering up dates claiming they specifically declined paying events in order to accommodate her schedule. 

I mean everyone has kids but Kenya – nasty side-eye from Cynthia – and they're all here, right?! NeNe Leakes announces she's releasing an album and going to law school and the first single is called "Excuses." It's an homage to Kim. NeNe is going to do a video rocking a baby bump and a wig. I really need Bravo to get on this ASAP and I really need to see it. If Chic C'est Le Vie can be a thing, Excuses can!

As Kandi fills Mama Joyce in on the latest Kim drama, Mama Joyce is not surprised. For as much as Kandi seems to get the wool pulled over her eyes by Kim, Mama Joyce can read Wig like a book! She reminds Kandi that Kim threw her own mother out of her wedding like a common criminal and that the woman lies like a rug and doesn't have any friends because no one is important to Kim, but Kim. Case in point, tossing her mom out of the wedding reception. 

Don't mess with a mama. It seems to be sinking into Kandi's brain that Kim is a grade-A user who will sweet talk anyone to their face and discard them faster than a synthetic wig once she gets what she needs. Let's just hope ol' Gomer Pyle has a little thing called a prenup! 

The next night Cynthia and Peter are meeting Wig-replacement Porsha for drinks. Kordell was supposed to attend, but can't and Peter is crushed. Apparently he has a bit of a men-crush on Kordell and was dying to meet him and smooze him up for some BarOne investment opportunities. 

Porsha reveals when she met Kordell she was attracted to him because he was "country" and the dead giveaway was his collared shirt.  She expects us to believe she had never heard of NFL great Kordell Stewart before? Even I had and the last time I was at a football game I was attending WVU and going for the tailgating. So yeah, not buying that! 

Since Kim has now officially relinquished her opening line and her place on the Anguilla trip, there is a vacancy and since Porsha has immediately vaulted from understudy to leading lady, Peter invites her on the trip. And with zero consideration she's like oh sure I can go. 

And so the Housewives all show up at the airport, ridiculous amount of luggage and husbands in tow, to depart to Anguilla. I'm always confused by their traveling attire. I fail to see how anyone can be comfy on an airplane for hours wearing a crotch length dress and hooker heels. Apparently this is why I am not a Housewife. 

Kandi's boyfriend Todd, who was pretending he was going to skip the trip, shows up to surprise her and she is relieved she won't have to face the crazy alone. 

Kenya arrives last and greets everyone but Porsha, who she visibly snubs. Kenya laughs about it, like "Porsha who?" and Porsha to her credit kept her comments to herself.  Kenya needs to get over her 1900 Miss USA self. 

On the plane Apollo is eating of all weird airplane food – grits! Kenya obviously thinks she's a contestant on The Bachelor cause she whispers to the camera that she's expecting a proposal from Walter in Anguilla and she will soon be a blushing bride! I'm betting a Kim revival has more of a chance of happening, but anyway! 

Jesus take the wheel – away from this crazy former pageant queen with a vendetta! 

When they land, they board a boat to Anguilla. Kenya decides to take the wheel and she steers the boat recklessly, hoping the women (and Walter) will all fall overboard leaving the husbands for her. Then she can drug them all and hold them hostage while she collects sperm samples. I'm guessing one unlucky man – Apollo – will be forced to be her sex slave or marry her and she'll never set him free! She laughs maniacally as she goes faster and faster and faster, shrieking at the woman to hold onto their weaves! 

While she doesn't manage to toss anyone overboard with her crazy driving, she does manage to force poor Cynthia's dress to fly open where her boob popped out. Luckily Cynthia was to prevent a total exposure moment, but she was not impressed. On land Peter, Cynthia, NeNe, and Gregg get to drive to the villa in an SUV while the B-Team is relegated to the group bus. 

Gregg reveals he tried his hardest not to look at Cynthia's exposed boob by covering the eye nearest to it and it was pretty funny. 

And on the bus, Kenya starts wheedling, begging, pleading with Walter for a ring. As they pass a jewelry store, she is practically in his lap whining, like he's Santa and all she wants for Christmas is a diamond the size of China. She was throwing himself at him like this was a 90's hair band video and the vixen would prance all over swinging their hair and crawling on the guys. The Rock of Love bus has crashed and burned, girl. 

Walter's response: "Those are blood diamonds." Out of the corner of her eye, Phaedra Parks observes every comment, every move and makes a mental note to let Walter know he's within grounds to file a sexual harassment suit and she is just the lady who can help…

Kenya keeps insisting she is ready for marriage because her career – the one no one has heard of since '95 – is so successful she doesn't even need to promote herself anymore. Apparently her production company is also very lucrative. They produce what again? Soft-core, aka Kim's spinoff… ?

As they get to the villa everyone shown their impressive rooms. NeNe and Gregg score the massive, luxury master. And Kenya, well she is downgraded to the Jr. Suite. A room that was previously reserved for Wigs and Gomer. 

Kenya starts throwing a fit. Whining to the bellhops, complaining about how low-class everything is. Where's her soaker tub? Where's her walk-in? She wants to stay at a different place. She just will not stop. This girl is persistent – a dog with a bone is right! Walter asks her if she took her meds as she is lying on the bed wailing about how unfair it is that she got the bad room and she's the most amazing person in the world.

Waaaaahhhh… no one ever gives Kenya what she wants. She wants a diamond. She wants a master suite. She wants a tub. SHE USED TO BE MISS USA, DAMMIT! I'm sure she would've pulled out the crown as leverage had Walter not slipped her a Valium. Walter is deeply regretting his decision to play her made-for-TV boyfriend. 

Across the villa Phaedra and Apollo are happy to have some alone time to focus on multiplying. Apollo is excited about the hot tub, but Ms. Phaedra Parks, Esq does not put her honey pot near any STD cesspools – especially ones shared with former Miss USAs and their penchant for rubbing their booties on the masses. 

Everybody knows… Phaedra does not mess around when it comes to vaginal trichomoniasis. BWHAHAHA With Apollo insisting one cannot catch a yeast infection from a hot tub, they dial up Phaedra's gyno who lets Apollo know it is apparently entirely possible. MTV are you aware of this? 

In the evening the couples hang out around the pool and NeNe hangs on Gregg literally, while her butt hangs out of her dress. Oops! Apollo is standing around shirtless and a frisky and desperate Kenya can't resist pushing him in the pool. Hair raises all around and everyone scopes out Phaedra's response. But Phaedra is a pro. She sits there stone-faced as Apollo returns the favor by pushing Kenya, dress and all, into the pool. Kandi mentions that Kenya better watch before Phaedra tasers her. And yes – Phaedra needs to get out her taser like NOW – on Apollo and Kenya. 

In her interview, Kenya giggles that maybe she was flirting. If throwing yourself on another man's husband can be called flirting. Wait – let me ask Kim and LeAnn Rimes about this – but anyway, no shame in Kenya's game right? Wrong. 

The next morning Phaedra cruises down the stairs in a thong bathing suit with a mesh cover-up. While I think Phaedra needs to put that donkey booty back in the barn, I have to admit there was nary cellulite in site and she donned that attire with purpose. As NeNe so eloquently put it: Keep your legs closed to married men, KENYA! And Phaedra was subtly sending a message that Apollo could not forget – her donkey booty was real and not surgically implanted. And it's the only one he better be focusing on. 

Hey, desperate times call for desperate measures. And when dealing with an unhinged former Miss USA with a fake booty who is chomping at the bit to get knocked up one better mark their territory and let her know whose sperm is already taken! Phaedra was a donkey booty super hero. 

Needless to say no one else could believe she wore that in public to tour Anguilla. They board a boat, then another boat, then another boat and in all the wind a trash bag blows in NeNe's face. I guess Kim was on the trip after all! 

Killer kiss! Run, Walter, Run! And then call OSHA. 

On Anguilla the couples split up for some alone time and Kenya uses this time to threaten to drown Walter in the ocean if he doesn't propose. Or better yet marry her in Anguilla. It would save them the trouble of a big wedding – and it would be totally captured by Bravo cameras. And she could upstage Cynthia's vow renewal. And Walter is on-board with this plan, right? – as as she digs her nails into his wrists and hisses in his face. Once he makes his sperm deposit she'll be done with him and he can go back to towing cars around town and being irrelevant.

Does she have some serious dirt on this man or does he just want business promotion, camera time? What? Those two have ZERO chemistry and that kiss he gave her was straight up sibling-esque. I cannot believe she expects us to think this relationship is legit. 

Watching from a few feet away, observing every move and word, are Phaedra and Apollo. Maybe they were waiting for that spot to open for their own camera time, but I prefer to take my reality TV with a splash of Lifetime and some soap opera stirred in. I think Phaedra is onto Kenya; her lies and her crazy and she is watching that fake-booty like a hawk!

Meanwhile, Kandi and Todd are spending their alone time at a bar that serves only drinks with the word "f–k" in them. Does Kim own this place? Apparently Kandi doesn't drink so she's having a virgin pina colada, while Todd gets a shot of "f–k me sideways." Kandi reveals the one time she drank liquor the place where she keeps her kegel balls got all warm and fuzzy and she just wanted to get some action. Todd summons the waitress to dump some liquor in Kandi's cocktail.

That evening Phaedra finally removes the thong. She won't get in a hot tub but she'll let her butt sit on public seats all over Anguilla? Anyway, she changes into something thongless – at least on the outside – and announces she's planned a cultural extravaganza as a thank you to Cynthia and Peter for arranging the trip. 

Out come the back-up dancers from Rihanna's umbrella, wearing figure skating costumes and shaking their booties. The other ladies get up to try their own butts at such maneuvers while a bemused NeNe looks on. Eventually she can take no more of these amateurs, and she saunters over to show them how it's done.

Ms. Leakes is a professional when it comes to booty shaking, popping, and pole dancing. And also apparently tongue jiggling. NeNe regales the group with stories of her own past collecting dollars on the pole, which is where she learned to prance and tip-toe around awkwardly in super high heels.

Porsha decides this is not her scene and retreats back to Kordell. Strippers, booty dances, former Miss USA's grinding their fake butt on some other girl's hubby. Um… no, she's too classy for all of that. While Kenya is throwing herself on Peter and shaking her assets all over the place. Walter is practically asleep and he couldn't look more disinterested if Peter was the one performing a lap dance on him. 

Yes, that's right, NeNe tried to teach Kenya how to do a lapdance with Walter for practice. Kenya puts a pillow over Walter's man area because she expects us to believe he had a boner from her frisky attempts. That was clearly a "zoner." Or a boner looking bump caused by the bunching in the fly area of a man's pants when they sit down. Nice try though, Miss – what was your title again? – Miss HO-S-A?

After all those escapades, Kenya starts trying to schmooze a member of the tourism board. She thinks he's handsome and charming. So handsome and charming, that regardless of his announcement that he's married and that her beloved is sitting a few feet away, she wants to know if he's ever thought about donating sperm. To her. She's a great candidate. After all she was once Miss USA and she's been on the cover of FHM Magazine! Kandi is shocked. 

Kenya is certainly not acting like a woman begging for a ring – her booty is on every man BUT Walter.

Back at the house, as Peter laughs about how Kenya was brazen enough to push Apollo into the pool and Phaedra looks on stoney faced, Kenya re-appears. 

Kenya sidles up to Porsha and Apollo with a very important question. She throws her arms around them both and innocently wants to know if Phaedra could give Apollo the gift of two of her friends, who would it be. Apollo looked very, very interested in his dessert as he didn't even look up. Meanwhile Phaedra in a silence that was deadly refused to comment before finally basically telling Kenya she was out of line and walking away. I have to hand it to Phaedra, she really held it together. 

And next week, things get completely out of line with Kenya as she battles with NeNe and Porsha! 

[Photo Credits: BravoTV.com]

TELL US – IS KENYA CRAZY OR IS THIS AN ACT? WHAT DO YOU THINK OF HOW PHAEDRA HANDLED HER FLIRTING WITH APOLLO? SHOULD "EXCUSES" BE THE NEXT HOUSEWIVES SONG?

Those Bravo ladies will do just about anything to have a story line, but Kenya Moore, the newbie from Real Housewives of Atlanta, is taking it to a whole new level by casting her own boyfriend and future hopeful fiance!  Now Walter Jackson is speaking out about his acting gig as Kenya's beau.

Kenya has gained quite a reputation for her flirting thus far this season, and her entire presence on the show revolves around her hope that Walter will soon put a ring on it.  But guess what?  Walter claims it is all a farce!  Sure, he dated Kenya…but according to him it was three years ago for just a couple months.  What?  I just love love the drama…and the honesty!  Find out about the craziness after the jump, as well as the latest and greatest on Kim Zolciak.

CLICK THE CONTINUE READING BUTTON FOR MORE!

In a recent radio interview, Walter opens up about his time on the show, and he drops a giant bombshell that he was acting the entire time and was not, in fact, dating Kenya while filming RHOA.  Well, that totally explains why her flirting didn't bother him in the least!

Speaking with Atlanta's V-103 radio show, Walter shares that his romance with Kenya this season was faker than Kim's hair.  WIG!  He says that after not hearing from Kenya for years after a brief relationship, she texted him to tell him about her move to the Peach State.  Walter recalls, "[She told me], 'I’m going to be doing this show. What do you think of reality TV?'

His response?  “I don’t know.  That’s kind of a stretch there.”

Kenya then ventured, “What if you play my boyfriend on the show?”  And a star is born!

Walter said that although he agreed to "act" as her boyfriend, he was shocked when she kept pushing marriage in their scenes.  When he didn't propose and Kenya attributed his aversion to marriage to the fact he was gay, Walter was floored.  He reveals, “I”m well established here. Gay has never been in the block. Why she would say that, I don’t know.”

Walter is now dating a younger woman.  Of the fauxmance, he reveals that Bravo producers had no clue.  Walter is happy with how he was portrayed on RHOA, and he explains, “I’m laid back. They did a great job. I’m not here to bash the show. It was our secret.”

Moving on to Kim news, Hollywood.com recently interviewed WIG! and she shared plans of a possible return to RHOA.  Kim also said that her dream house was almost ready.  Sure it is, Kim.  She confirms a second season of Don't Be Tardy For The…Whatever, and shares that she isn't opposed to a RHOA return.  She says of season six, "I won't be pregnant! I've been pregnant for the last two years. I can handle my own over the five years [of taping the show], but when I'm pregnant I try to keep myself calm because I have another life to take care of. If I'm taping and I'm not pregnant, I'll be back to my fiery self."

Kim adds, "I had blood pressure problems. Filming is stressful, you know. I got to the point, where I had enough. The last thing I wanted, I didn't want to put my son in my stomach in jeopardy."

One last Kim tidbit is hilarious, so feel free to laugh.  She admits, "I don't like confrontation and it's always been hard when there are fights, I get so irritated by it. Being on the bus with Nene [Leakes], she's someone you have to watch out for. She can be physical. It's one thing to be in a argument, it's another thing to get physical."  Yeah, Kim hates confrontation about as much as I hate winning lottery tickets.

At least Kim can laugh about her wig pull with SheBySheBroke Sheree Whitfield.  She jokes, "I think the most talked about [fight] was when Sheree pulled my wig, which was funny. It wasn't funny at the time, but it's funny now." Funny?  Try hilarious!

TELL US-WHAT DO YOU THINK OF WALTER'S ADMISSION?  DO YOU WANT KIM TO RETURN FOR SEASON 6?

[Photo Credit: WENN.com]

Here at RT, our job is to snark on all things reality television, be it stars, shows, or just general gossip.  I'm not going to lie…it can be a lot of fun, and usually the people, programs, and situations make it super easy to write (hopefully) hilarious blog posts.  However, when one of us is fortunate enough to get to interview one of the reality stars we normally joke about, it's a wake-up call…in a good way!

Yesterday I had the opportunity to speak with former Real Housewives of Atlanta star Sheree Whitfield about what has been going on in her life now that she is no longer involved with Bravo.  I'll be honest, I was a tad bit nervous.  It's not every day you get to have a conversation with someone you watched religiously on TV, especially when part of your job is to spew humor at her expense.  I'm from a city in South Carolina just two hours from Atlanta, and the ATL was a favorite stomping ground in college and remains a shopping mecca for people in my neck of the woods.  That said, RHOA and its stars have always held a special place in my heart.  I'll likely never eat at RHOBH's Lisa Vanderpump's SUR (sigh), but it's really cool to see the women of Atlanta dining and shopping places I've actually been.  Of course, when I graced those restaurants and boutiques I ate a side salad and purchased nada. 

Sorry for digressing, but I felt the need to share part of the reason why I was so excited to chat with Sheree.  She couldn't have been more professional, kind, and gracious.  Sheree dished on her new jewelry line, her plans for the future, her gratitude towards her fans, and her thoughts on RHOA. 

CLICK THE CONTINUE READING BUTTON FOR MORE!

Sheree has a new jewelry line that launched this week, and she's thrilled to share it with her fans.  She describes the line as being "great pieces that can take you from day to night…pieces you could wear with a white button down shirt or a t-shirt or cocktail attire."  Her line incorporates a lot of gold and bold geometric shapes.  She shares, "It was important for me to try to accomplish a line that looks great and is affordable."

When I asked her about her new project, Sheree was equal parts humble and excited.  She said, "Right now, my main focus is putting my all into this jewelry line.  I'm really excited about it, and I think it's going to do really well.  I think that people will really take to it.  I launched with a small collection for the holidays, Celebrations, but I can't wait for spring.  My true passion and my true interest has always been designing, so this is me getting to live out my dream."

To her fans Sheree wants to express her gratitude, telling me, "I want to thank everyone because I've gotten so much support.  I definitely want to let the fans know that I love and appreciate them.  Without them, this is nothing.  I was part of the Housewives for four seasons, and I am thankful I developed such a great, great fan base, and they are very supportive."

Of course, what I really wanted to know about was whether Sheree has been keeping up with RHOA this season.  I can't say I was shocked by her answer.  She admitted, "I honestly don't.  I have not had a chance to catch it.  Of course in Atlanta people talk about it all the time, but I haven't gotten a chance to catch a full episode.  I watched last week with Kenya [Moore] and her boyfriend.  People are definitely talking…it's like the Kenya show!"  We then laughed about the rumors that Kenya hired Walter for a storyline, but Sheree was very conscious not to say anything negative, she just laughed that she had read that gossip somewhere. 

When asked about her former co-stars, Sheree said she doesn't keep up with the ladies, stating, "Every now and then, I may see Kandi [Burruss] through a mutual friend."

Given that we all watched Kim Zolciak peace out recently, I was curious as to Sheree's take on the situation.  I asked if she had comments on Kim's dramatic exit, to which she replied, "No, no, I heard about it months ago, but how it went down, quit or fired, I don't know.  I just hope she's happy."  I must admit, I am loving the diplomatic Sheree!

Getting back to designing, we will be seeing more stylish pieces from She By Sheree.  Of another clothing line, Sheree revealed, "Yes, that's definitely something I want to do.  Absolutely.  But it takes time…these things don't happen overnight.  I will definitely be coming back with clothing as well." 

She added, "People always want to know what I had in mind when I created with this jewelry collection.  The woman I had in mind when I created this collection is today's woman.  She's active, she's stylish, she's determined, she works hard, she's busy, she cares about her family, she wants it all, and she does it.  She looks great, and she does it while living within her means…she's you, she's me, she's every woman." 

Sheree concluded, "I just want people to know that I'm still here.  Right now, my main focus is the jewelry, and of course my family.  I want to wish everyone a happy holiday and thank them for their love and support."

I really enjoyed my chat with Sheree, and I'm including a link to her jewelry line, as well as some pictures of some of the pieces I will be adding to my jewelry box this holiday season!  You can see it all at SheBySheree.KitsyLane.com. 

TELL US-WHAT DO YOU THINK OF SHEREE'S HOLIDAY JEWELRY COLLECTION?

[Photo Credit: Twitter; SheBySheree/Kitsy Lane]

Lanai Bracelet $40

Blee Ring $35

Monet Earrings $40

Jade Necklace $75

Oh Phaedra Parks, you always tell it like it is.  The lawyer/mortician hybrid from Real Housewives of Atlanta loves to enlighten us all with her Southern analogies and Donkey Booty.  While she can be sweet as sugar, I certainly wouldn't want to cross her.

This season we're seeing more of Phaedra (literally!  Was she serious with that thong bathing suit??), and we're also getting to see more of her spitfire personality.  In other words, we learn that Phaedra doesn't like to share…when it comes to her husband Apollo Nida.  Of course, who can blame her?

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Phaedra recently spoke to the Examiner about the fifth season, its fan base, and Kim Zolciak's peace out from the show.  She also reveals who her closest friends are and why certain ladies need to back away from her husband.  Check it out below!

How does it feel to be back for the 5th season of The Real Housewives of Atlanta and for it to be one of the top rated shows on Bravo?

It’s always an honor to be involved with any successful business venture…Our show is the most successful in the franchise, which speaks volumes because people enjoy watching us and can relate to our lives. We can be proud of the things that have happened on the show, but even more proud that we have a stable viewership that stands by us, even with the least amount of advertising.

Why do you think so many viewers are drawn into the Housewives of Atlanta specifically?

I think a lot of people can relate to our personalities, there is at least one of us in every person in the world, and I think we have a variety and someone can at least identify with one of the cast members. We’re the only franchise that has a predominately African-American cast and I think that people are drawn into the African-American community, because it has a lot of diversity even within our own culture, and going deeper into the south, we have our own culture down here as well that many people are interested in things that are happening in the south, including some of the best productions. Economically it’s cheaper to shoot here, but on the plus there’s a charm that’s here in the south. I also think people are also interested in seeing how we do things and live in the south.

How would you say you’ve grown over the years and what have you learned about yourself?

To be honest, I was quite mature when I came on the show and I know who I am…It has taught me a lot about people in general, I’ve learn how gullible people can be, and how the media can be, but overall I’m comfortable with who I am.

What is the biggest misconception that people have of you from watching the show?

I’ve heard people say that I’m “boogie” but that would be the furthest thing from the truth, I’m probably the most approachable of all the ladies on the show. I think that when people are educated and polished, unfortunately some people think that “Oh they think they are better than others.” I think it’s a good thing to have standards and morals and I think that we are missing right now. Even in regards to the current Connecticut tragedy, I think people are missing those family values that used to keep children in line and made them more sensitive to others. I believe that children and young adults need to realize that respect and integrity needs to be at the forefront of everything and I don’t think that we are teaching that in the homes as we used to, because everyone is so rushed and working…doing everything besides teaching them life lessons, and leaving it up to television.

Three words to describe season 5?

Crazy…unpredictable…drama (laughs). I didn’t even see all of this coming!

What do you think will surprise viewers the most this season?

Obviously we’ve added new cast members, and some of them have personalities that we’ve never seen on the show. But I think the shocking and deceitful behavior of some will be very different from seasons in the past.

What were your thoughts on Kim’s departure from the show?

At the table with all the bickering, I realized that her priorities have changed and her main focus shifted to her family and there is nothing wrong with that. Whatever it is that you love, that’s what you should do. That’s why I asked her the question, “Do you have time for your girlfriends?” and when she answered, “no.” It was a clear indicator that she had grew to a point in her life that her number one priority was her family, and I can respect that. I think that more of us need to focus on our families…I like Kim and we speak occasionally and I will continue to speak to her and support her in any endeavors that she is involved in, if she doesn’t have time for the ladies I understand, sometimes I feel like I don’t have time…it’s all about what’s important to you, and her allegiance is with her husband and her children.

Over the years who would you say you formed a real relationship with when the cameras aren’t rolling?

Kandi [Burrus] and I are extremely close, we are “besties” when the cameras aren’t rolling…we travel together, double date together, we both adore each other’s family, so I would say Kandi first, and I would say Cynthia [Bailey] second, her daughter, Noelle babysits Ayden for us, so I spend time at their house often.

What can viewers expect to see with you and Apollo's Donkey Booty Workout video?

I’m so excited about it! It's $12.95 at www.phinebody.com or Amazon, cheaper than a steak dinner (laughs)! Fun and high energy and aerobics, I’m doing the dance portion of the workout first as well as toning and strengthen portion second and a cool down at the end. Its fun and exciting, but you won’t sweat yourself to death, and you will see results! It’s the workout that I used to get back in shape after I had my baby. It will make a great Christmas gift and or stocking stuffer!

How do you balance your time between the show, mortuary school, your law profession, & a mother & wife?

I’m enrolled full-time in mortuary school, and as we speak I’m looking at a skull in my anatomy class that I’m labeling…not an actual one (laughs). Sometimes I feel like an illegal immigrant in Arizona (laughs) “What am I doing?” I feel like I have to run back across the border and get a regular job. It’s very difficult, but I have a great support staff, great parents, great friends, great husband, and everyone pitches in. It’s a lot of prioritizing and we try to do everything in the best interest of our son and our family.

What were your thoughts as you watch Kenya this season and do you think she flirted with your husband?

This is the thing, Kenya [Moore] is very inappropriate and as she showed she flirts with everyone as she is quite the attention seeker, and she obviously likes to drink more than most, and I think when you add that combination, it makes for a very un-lady like woman. You hope that women over 40 are able to act their age and not their shoe size, but that’s not always the case. I didn’t like it, I thought it was very distasteful and very inappropriate, but that’s who she is. You can’t make a loose woman a lady.

Lastly, what can viewers expect from you as this season progresses?

You will get to see the development of the whole Donkey Booty video, the good, bad, and ugly (laughs). It turns out very well in the end! Just like seasons in the past you will see more wonderful events and of course the drama. I think it will be our best season ever. We are very thankful that our ratings have been great, and there are no stones unturned with our new cast mates.

Did you hear that, Santa?  Donkey Booty makes a great stocking stuffer!  I've been a good girl this year…

TELL US-WHAT DO YOU THINK OF PHAEDRA'S INTERVIEW?

[Photo Credit: Twitter]

After getting evicted from her dream home, former Real Housewives of Atlanta star Kim Zolciak moved back to her "tiny" condo with husband Kroy Biermann and her kids.  Since leaving the mansion, Kim and Kroy have been overseeing the construction of their new dream house, which sounds like it will be even bigger and more lavish than the last one. 

Kim revealed today that Chez Biermann will feature EIGHT fireplaces.  EIGHT.  Kim Zolciak needs a lot of heat in her house, y'all.   Kim shared on Twitter that she was checking out the new manse, "At the new house freezing our asses off!!!!!!!!!!!"  When a fan replied, asking if there were any fireplaces, Kim shared, 8 but our house isn't close to being finished!"

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Of course there was a chorus of negative comments, including "Yea because it doesn't exist!", to which Kim told said hater to do some research.

It shouldn't be too long until we get a glimpse of Kim's new digs.  According to her things are chugging along quickly.  "Wow!!! Stopped by our new house today they r moving quick…. Its coming together! Decisions decisions!!! Sooo excited!!!!!!!"

I hope the build of Kim's new dream house will be part of her spinoff show's storyline.  I need to see this.  Need.  Anyone live close?  We need photographic evidence!

Let's speculate what Kim could do with all those fireplaces.  There could be a fireplace for roasting marshmallows, one for drying wigs, hmmm…what else?

TELL US – WHAT WOULD YOU DO WITH EIGHT FIREPLACES?  ARE YOU DYING TO SEE McTACKY MANOR?

Photo Credit: Twitter

It exists!  Kim Zolciak took to Twitter to show off the work in progress that is her new dream home! 

The former Real Housewives of Atlanta star writes, "Giving u a sneak peek of Our work in progress #watchoutjoneses". 

I have to admit I'm dying to see this thing completed and to get a glimpse of those eight fireplaces! 

TELL US – THOUGHTS ON CHEZ BIERMANN SO FAR?

Photo Credit: Twitter

Oh, Kim Zolciak… do you not know what the word truth means? I mean at this point the lies amount for more than the number of wigs you own! The latest half-truth via Kim Z concerns her new mansion!

The former Real Housewives of Atlanta star has been bragging up a storm about her massive new mansion which contains a whopping EIGHT (yes, 8!) fireplaces, which I like to think of as wig drying receptacles. Well, apparently that's just the tip of the iceberg. Remember how Kim said she, Kroy Biermann, and their four kiddies had moved into Big Poppa's condo while waiting for dream house no. 2 to be built? 

Let's just say the word "built" should be used loosely. According to super sleuths TamaraTattles and TV Fishbowl Kim purchased a home located in The Manor Golf and Country Club in Alpharetta, GA. It's an uber fancy subdivision and golf course where former RHOA star DeShawn Snow's home was also located. DeShawn sold the house following her divorce. 

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TamaraTattles reported that Kim got a good deal on the land because the developers went bankrupt in the process of building portions of the neighborhood, but that's not exactly the truth. According to original legal documents unearthed from TV Fishbowl Kim actually bought an already built house. The very house she is claiming to be building. 

And Kim bought that house as a FORECLOSURE! That's right! So she bought a pre-existing, foreclosure she is renovating just like her FORMER friend Kandi Burruss. That same friend that Kim was ragging on. If you recall Kim can't live in a "used home" despite the fact that Kim was renting to a home she was subsequently evicted from!

Really Kim? Really? You lied about this?! Seriously… I really must believe all those wigs are squeezing her brain too tight. I have no excuse for Gomer Pyle. 

According to TV Fishbowl, Kim's "house" was originally listed for $3.7 M when the developers went bankrupt and reduced the house by over $1M. It still didn't sell. The bank then reduced the home to $999,900 but accepting best offers. Which is when Kim and Kroy swooped in and nabbed the house  for $880,000! The low price explains how Kim and Kroy can afford to live in such an otherwise super ritzy exclusive neighborhood. 

Kim and Kroy closed on the home in October and began renovations. They did NOT tear down the house and rebuild. Fishbowl has photos of the home before Kim purchased it and it is the same exact house Kim recently posted a photo of on twitter. What I don't understand is why Kim would lie about this? I personally would be thrilled I got such a great deal – the house sounds fabulous. 

Below are the Foreclosure MLS Listing Details as provided by the bank. Kim's new home has 5 bedrooms, 6.5 baths, and sits on two acres. And in case you hadn't heard it also has 8 fireplaces. 

Well, well… it's no wonder Kandi is totally sick of Kim. She ragged on her "friend" on national television, insulting her home, and then she turns around and does the same thing. And notice she didn't bother telling people she bought a used home in foreclosure. Oh, no… she went around pretending she was building from scratch a brand, spankin' new mansion.

Oh, Kim – did you really think you were going to get away with that?

[Photo Credit: Kim Zolciak's Twitter]

TELL US – WHAT DO YOU THINK OF ALL THE DETAILS ON KIM'S NEW HOME? SURPRISED SHE BOUGHT A FORECLOSURE?

Aaahhh… Kim Zolciak. She's certainly got an interesting perspective on things. The former Real Housewives of Atlanta star made this tweet about her husband Kroy Biermann. Oh, the irony… 

I think I'll file this under: "Things I don't agree with." Maybe we'll get to see proof of Kroy's genius on Kim's spinoff Don't Be Tardy. Or it could just be another one of her lies… 

[Photo Credit: Twitter]

TELL US – DO YOU THINK KROY IS A "GENIUS"?